This year has turned out to be a doozy. We have been dealing with the COVID-19, massive unemployment and civil unrest, and that was just the first half of the year. Now that we are leaving 2020 behind with all the upheavals and distress, I would like to know what are you thankful for.
Thanksgiving is not the best holiday for me. My 2-year-old son Jarod Efrem Kidd died from cardiac arrest on Thanksgiving day 1988. There will never be a thanksgiving that will the same. He was my smiler. No matter what was happen Jarod would smile and that would make me smile back. One day that smile went away. I was a believer in Christ, but a shaky believer at that. The death of my son this just made me angry with God. I was 19 years old with 2 other kids. 1 older and 1 younger than Jarod. Fearing my own feelings, feeling alone because I was a single mother with 3 kids, one of which is now ill from something I know nothing about. Being called a neglectful for mother by a worker in the hospital because I asked a question. The place that I thought would help me was judging me (at least the world that was my life at the time). Then add God to that list. I just know God was judging me for having 3 kids at a young age. This was the penalty for disobedience to his doctrine. He would take one of my babies. The hurt and pain was so deep that words could not describe. I felt like dying myself. It would be years of rebelling against God and truly learning his love toward Jarod and myself before I could let go of that hurt and pain.
Some of you are in hurt mode with God right now. You have lost a family member or members, friend, boss, co-worker or neighbor and that pain is real. Maybe it was unexpected death like mine or it was an illness that endured for a while it just never feels good when they leave. There is a hole in your heart for the place they held. The smile, the laughter and the joy that they brought to your life. We are suppose to understand death as children of God and yet we don’t. Death is a mystery that plagues us daily. Some try everything in the world to try not see it, even though the bible says it will happen to us all.
No, this is not one of those sad blogs, this is about being thankful. Jarod is home with his heavenly Father waiting on all his family to join him, and I know they will one day. He has a story to tell us as he watched our lives with the cloud of witness. And just like Jarod and the rest of my family and friends will be a cheering when I get to heaven. I’m thankful that my son did not suffer another as we waited for a heart transplant. I am thankful that he is not trying to breathe anymore but dancing and running in heaven with all the other children that have gone home.
This year may leave with most of us say Goodbye but for a moment look and see where you can be thankful. I had COVID-19 and survived; I am thankful. Where many are without a job I have one, and I’m thankful. My children are alive and well and my 11 grandchildren, I’m thankful. I am blessed to still have both of my parents still here. My husband has suffered a lot this year, but I am thankful. No meals missed, not suffering from homelessness, not without garments, yes I’m thankful.
Look around I don’t know what you will see but if you see anything to be thankful.